Living with breast cancer in my twenties

....from above my head and I am feeling much better this week. I did not end up going to Glastonbury unfortunately but had a lovely weekend with my best friend. We spoke about a lot of things that were bothering me and and he helped me to make sense of them all. I feel I know what to do to carry on with my future in a positive and painless way. Knowing is the easy part though, its the doing thats the hardest bit. I defiantly need to draw in my energy for a while so that I can recover fully. The weather was beautiful at the weekend and I made the most of it by going on walks. I went to Pittsford reservoir with my sister on Friday, Thornton reservoir on Saturday and Pittsford again on the Sunday. I had never been to Thornton reservoir before, its beautiful. I didn't feel like I was in Leicestershire, I could have easily been abroad. I really really enjoyed getting out and walking, especially by some water too. I love water and really miss living by the sea. I always found the sea so ...

I am so happy that the sun is shining and spring is on its way because at the moment I am my happiest sitting out in the natural elements taking in the new spring air. I feel it is appropriate timing that I am finishing my treatment and will be starting to live my life again when Spring is emerging. The Spring equinox begins this weekend, when night and day stand in perfect balance. The Spring Equinox represents new life and growth. The lethargy of winter is dissipating and there is the promise of life becoming more exuberant. This equinox is also known as Ostara or Eostre - and is celebrated as a festival of new growth, renewal, a re-balancing of energies and the return of longer days. "Goddess of fertility and new beginnings, we take this opportunity to embrace Eostre's passion for new life and let our own lives take the new direction we have wanted for so long." I mentioned in my last post the last chemo being bittersweet and how its left me feeling alone and desponde...

Since finishing chemo emotionally I have been all over the place. I was expecting to be more unwell then I have been but I seem to have managed to get away with it more lightly this time. Its true when they tell you that each one can be very different and there is no consistency to how you are going to feel after each one. I had the sore throat and the aches and pains for a few days but I have been up and about most of the time. I do get tired very quickly though and forget what state my health is in and can quickly over do it. At the moment I can pretty much guarantee when it gets to late afternoon I start to feel tired or even a little poorly. Emotionally though I have not been feeling too good, up until now anyway. Finishing chemo feels bittersweet. You are left feeling slightly dejected and alone. One minute your living your life or in my case trying to build a new one and then suddenly in one fell swoop your life is turned upside down. Your life is then consumed by this disease a...

A few weeks ago I appeared in some Leicestershire newspapers about doing the Cancer research race for life. I had not got round to actually signing up and asking people for some sponsor money. So seeing as I have been lying in bed getting over my last bout of chemo I thought I had better get on with it. It will be on the 12th July 11AM at Western park, Leicester. I will do my damned hardest to run it but have no idea how I will be feeling by then. I don't think I could even run a mile normally but I have never trained for anything like this before. My level of fitness must be at a zero right now so not only will this race raise money for a great cause it will be a great excuse for me to get fit again, and boy do I need an excuse to do some exercise! We all know cancer touches many of us. We have either been affected by it or know someone who has been. Therefore we know what a debilitating and frightening disease it is. Some people battle on for years and the disease sadly gets the...

..now that my chemo is over. I can not believe its been over 6 months since I was diagnosed with breast cancer. It only seems like yesterday I was sitting with my oncologist who was telling me what was ahead of me. At the time it was all too much to take in and I could barely conceive of the idea of going through what I have just gone through. But, I have done it! The worst is defiantly over. I coped with the surgery so much better then I had ever imagined and the chemo as grueling as it has been is finally over! It has been a slight anti-climax as I am obviously having to get over the last bout of it so I have not been able to celebrate nor do I have the energy to sound enthusiastic about finishing. I am however extremely relieved its over and proud of myself for getting through it. There were many low and bleak moments but I got through them and I think I have learnt a lot from all the time I have had getting through this. I was hoping my last chemo session in hospital was going to ...